Is this a beautiful girl or what? I miss her. Tequila was my cat for 15 years. She died of her old age and went to what Aidan calls Kitty Heaven. We are pretty sure she is a furry little angel! She was a very loyal friend while she was here. These past months have been very strange for me without her around. I found her in my apartment building lobby when she was a little kitten. We were fast friends. I always had cats growing up and felt that she understood me! I used to even joke that the way she looks at me, so unconditionally loved me that we were surely married in a past life! I think we have met in a few lives now. We survived a couple of moves, one BAD relationship and more and more boys coming into our home. She was easy to please but still a bit of a diva, no wonder we clicked!
Her coat would be wet with my tears more times than I could count. She held my secrets because there are just some things I told no one else. She loved to sit and watch me/hear me sing to my CD's, my number one fan. Tequila's favourite spot to sleep was on my pillow on top of my hair. She preferred to drink from the tap instead of a dish so we always had company in the bathroom. She hid from visitors, stayed indoors, and begrudgingly accepted our puppy although made it clear that she was the princess of the house.
I am thinking about her as we begin to look for another kitten. I feel guilty, like she is alone somewhere and we are just moving on. It may seem childish but my feelings sometimes are I suppose. When Tequila died, and I had the feeling she was gone before we even found her, it was me who cried right away. Mike consoled me, Josh and Aidan both hugged me and cried a little too. I did not think I would have really felt the need to grieve, but I have.
Miss Tequila, you are the sweet kitty that helped me so much to cope with some difficult situations in my growing years! You also offered Josh and Aidan a companion, teaching them how to love animals and that connections in our lives are not only with people. You were always as lovable as can be. Thank you for what you gave to our family. Finding you was not by chance. I know you were there in my life to offer me a little light... to get me through. You left, I guess when you saw all was well!!
2 comments:
Laurel, I above all people know how you feel. I have loved and lost many pets over my lifetime and more than one of them was a very special part of my life. I'm thinking now of Misty and Mandy of course. You know how Wayne and I both grieved for them. Losing Mandy was heartbreaking, but I was truly greatful that after I had made the difficult decision to have her put down, she had the grace and dignity to die on her own in our backyard. As difficult as it was for Wayne to find her that way, it was still easier to accept than if I had to take her to the vets and say good-bye. When Misty died, just 7 months later, I felt it was partly to be with her sister but it was still so hard to accept. I watched her pass on and a part of my heart went with her. After vowing I would not let another animal into my heart, I let Wayne talk me into another dog. When Beau picked Wayne out, notice it wasn't the other way around, I swore he would be Wayne's dog and not mine. Beau had other ideas. He wormed his way into my heart and now I can't think what it would be like not to have him. It probably helps that he has become the 'friendliest dog in Hamilton' as all of his conquests will attest. Percy too has become one of our family. I know how hard it is to accept the need of a new pet into your home and heart, but I know Tequila would want you to share what she had with you with another pet. Just remember her and all of the things that she taught you and you will serve her well.
Love, mom
Laurel, can I always count on visiting you here and finding such wisdom in your thoughts and from the people who you share them with (aka your mother).. she has such a wonderful way at putting things into perspective. Anne should have a blog of her own thoughts as her vivid memory and ability to articulate herself "serve us all well." I hope your mother and daughter relationship will continue to be a solid and fortifying one. Love to you both.
xoxoxox.. (p.s. this passage really made me cry because I am grieving my two babies- Sable and Barney. I had to let them go and I carry a lot of guilt that I must be ready to let go of. It is for this reason I may have to copy you and write myself to wellness about it!
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